Holiday Happenings

I'm here! Bring on the holidays!

It was just about this time last year when Chris, Grandma and I were taking a walk in the “cool” fall weather, which in Phoenix means mid-80s, to look at Halloween decorations. Among the blow-up ghosts and witches who can’t fly straight, we ran across a neighbor who had a fake skeleton half-buried in their yard. Chris stopped in her tracks and said, “That is literry a whole skeleton.”

            “Don’t you mean ‘literally’?” I asked. I explained to her that litter is trash and that literal is probably the correct word she was looking for, although maybe the bones were trash that someone just threw on the ground.

            For my English lesson, I received a haughty stare that clearly said I know nothing at all. Then Chris flipped her ponytail and said in the iciest voice she could muster, “You are littery driving me crazy.” When Grandma and I started to laugh, she stopped again in her tracks and reminded us that, “It’s not nice to mock kids, you know!”

As a side note, I think it was just luck that she got the usage right, because like most Americans she uses the word “littery” literally all the time, even in the wrong exaggerated context. Often, it’s when she claps her hands, jumps up and down and says she “littery” can’t wait for the holidays. OK, I admit that she says literally now like a grown-up kid. But it doesn’t change the fact that we are starting to gear up for all the wonderful holidays.

Miss Piggy Meets Tinkerbell (AKA Mommy & Chris)

First comes Halloween, of course, where Chris will tell me no less than four times that THAT is the house where the boys scared her two years ago. “And,” she will rant, “What kind of teenager would try to scare a little kid? They are not nice boys.” But she will get over it as soon as that candy is in her bucket.

Soon, we will head into Thanksgiving and the house will be packed with hand-shaped turkey pictures. Least year our Thanksgiving motto was brought home from kindergarten by Chris. As we walked by frozen turkeys at the grocery store she looked at me seriously and said, “My friend Maddie told me that you smack a turkey on the butt. I told her that’s not nice. You’re not supposed to smack people…..Or turkeys.”

I don’t really know what Maddie meant, but from here on out whenever the turkey comes out of the refrigerator on its way to the oven, it should expect a big ol’ smack on the hindquarters.

Ready for 'Chris'-tmas

In our tryptophan haze we will head directly into the Christmas season. For a good three or four years, our only child was certain that Christmas was a holiday created specifically for her. After all, try as we might we couldn’t convince her that there is a ‘T’ in ‘Chris’mas. And she does have the most presents of anyone under the tree. Now is the age when she finally is starting to understand the true meaning of Christmas and is very excited to get to that story about the baby Jesus in her children’s bible.

Meanwhile, she isn’t ready to give up her childhood dreams of Santa Claus. When discussing the tooth fairy (who had to make an emergency visit and was probably glad to give up four heavy, slightly lint-covered quarters instead of a crisp dollar bill), she told me that she’s not quite sure she believes in things like that anymore.

Those were her exact words: “Mom, I’m not quite sure I believe in the tooth fairy or Santa Claus or anything like that anymore.”

When I asked her why, she offered the dreaded explanation that she’s “heard things” at school and on TV. She tried to trip me up by asking what I believe in, but I stood firm, telling her I still believe in all the wonderful holiday mascots – Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and all the rest. I did have to dance a little when she asked me about ghosts and witches and turkeys and I don’t think she believed my concession that I just believe in the good ones that are nice to kids. In fact, I think she was already, sadly, pretty skeptical about the whole holiday situation.

She was quiet for a while and I assumed she was trying to come to some sort of decision about how she would react to holidays in the future. She knows, deep down, that they’re not real but she isn’t ready to give up the magic quite yet.

After a while, she sighed and said again, “Hmmmm, I’m just not sure what I believe anymore. But, I’m just going to forget about it for a while. At least until Christmas is over.”

She’s no dummy, that kid.

Bring the presents and nothing changes. Yet.